When your heart is breaking and you don’t know where to turn, you look up at the universe and sob “What do I do now?”
When loss is looming and you can see tragedy ahead, you reach your arms out and will someone to hold.
When desperation sets in and you feel so alone, when the nights are long and the pain is real, when no one could possibly understand your upside down world, that’s when you need your anchor point.
What have you been cultivating? How deep is your strength?
Where are your strongest relationships? Who is that one person that will be your gladiator, mama, or partner in this situation?
Who is your community? Who are your people?
How do you identify God? To whom do you call out?
Where do you feel safe? What is that physical place of shelter?
How do you know love? You don’t have to smile, but what, where, or who will make you feel a touch of warmth?
So when you ask “What do I do now?”, don’t. It’s right there. You don’t have to “do.” It’s done. Just sit. Cry. Listen. Let the time go by. This world takes care of itself. And you don’t control it. You just feel it. So feel all the feels. Just let it wash over you. You won’t break. You won’t.
If you haven’t prepared yet, that’s ok too. Start now. Because you will have a moment of desperation. Someday. We all do.
And the most important thing is that you have the tools to dig yourself out of the black hole. Gather the tools you’ll need to face the strange, deep, intense feelings of despair, sadness, or anger. Allow yourself to feel your feelings, but don’t let them own you. Grief, but cope. Rage, but regroup. Weep, but hope.
The way to do this is to take a deep breath and say to yourself “hello dear human.” Then start addressing the questions above. Understand who your community is. Find your spiritual power. Know what safety is (both emotionally and physically). Accept and foster love. Be kind to yourself. Protect yourself. Look out for others. Never let go of hope.